yaoi crossover ot4 wtf

[jukeboxhound_backup]

So I admitted that I'm tempted to write Sephiroth/Roy, just to see if I could, and shiri_matakami  and artimusdin  were all like YES PLZ, and I was like BUT I SUCK AT SMUT, so a morning-after was suggested, but I'm lazy and so did this instead, and I couldn't just leave Zack and Cloud hanging.  And am posting it because it makes me lol and because I've been putting off my course reading all day anyway, so what's a little while longer.



hadesphoenix :

Roy: *sitting on edge of bed* *unsettled but trying not to show it*
Zack: Dude, last night was awesome. LET'S DO IT AGAIN. AND THEN AGAIN. >:3
Roy: ...
Sephiroth: *silently amused at Roy*
Cloud: I'll go make some coffee.
Roy: How can you just...
Cloud: *confused* What?
Roy: You're...taking this awfully well. (For a kid, he didn't say.)
Cloud: ...Why wouldn't I?
Zack: *guffaws*
Sephiroth: You really can't ever argue with him, Mustang.
Cloud: *still confused*
Roy: You're really not bothered.
Cloud: Um. I know it isn't exactly normal but that's okay, right, I mean I think everyone enjoyed themselves, and I thought you liked coffee?
Roy: You're very...pragmatic, aren't you?
Cloud: ...Thank you?
Zack: *dying of lulz*
Sephiroth: *smug*

artimusdin :

Sephiroth: *waits until Cloud is out of the room* *to Roy* You will not be stealing him, he is our soldier.
Roy: ... *confused*
Zack: *cheerfully* Find your own loyal soldiers. <3

hadesphoenix :

Cloud: Oh shit!
Everyone: *freezes*
Cloud: What's Fullmetal gonna say?
Roy: I can think of many things, but to which in particular are you referring?
Zack: *mutters* Trust you to speak without putting a preposition at the end like normal people.
Cloud: Didn't you know?
Roy: Again, what in particular should I know?
Cloud: He likes you!
Zack: Oh, this'll be good.
Sephiroth: *watching the action unfold*
Roy: *blink*
Cloud: Oh shit, he's gonna be pissed, I mean, I knew but we still - it's not like people don't know about you -
Zack: LOL MANSLUT
Roy: *wry* Thank you, Lieutenant.
Cloud: - but still we...oh. Shit. You didn't know, did you?
Roy: *...slow feline smile*
Cloud: *headdesk*
Zack: *iz ded from lulz*

artimusdin :  LOL. Now I picture Cloud sending Ed "I'm sorry" flowers. Or something, idk.
hadesphoenix : Or real Nibelheim shepherds pies, made of kidneys and blood and stomach lining all proper-like, and then wonder why everyone's gagging as Ed plows through them like a gluttonous glutton.
artimusdin : YES. And Cloud totally made enough for everyone else to have some if they wanted, but nobody seems to want any, so hey, that's more for Cloud and Ed, right? And when Zack turns down food, you know something's up...
hadesphoenix : But Ed doesn't care because hey, free food, and Zack's all shrug-y because they eat weirder shit in the jungle, right. Except when Ed's licking the last pan clean he's gonna pause and go, Wait. Waaaaait. YOU FUCKING TOLD THE FUCKING COLONEL BASTARD, to which Sephiroth would smirk and say, Freudian slip there, Fullmetal? Little mistake? And then Ed’s gonna be all DIE MOTHERFUCKER DIE.

Thus, the saga continues.  This looks oddly like one of din's and my conversations.

Comments

[doomchocobo.livejournal.com]

This was a wonderful way to start my day. I'm really loving how cloud is totally fine with the whole random sex with superior officer added in, but then only things about afterward how ed's going to feel. Course now I'm wondering how ed and cloud even got close enough for eddy-boy to admit that XD

[jukeboxhound.livejournal.com]

I always liked my mental canon of Cloud being all practical because even though he's fucked up in the head in the game, and falling apart in AC, he still keeps going and Gets Shit Done. Even if he has to be poked a bit along the way sometimes.

...I'm gonna do a bit of hand-waving at that particular little plothole because it'd ruin my amusement otherwise. Maybe he sees Ed raging up a storm and is all, Huh, it's like the guy that pulls the hair of the girl he likes on the playground.

[chofi.livejournal.com]

This looks oddly like one of din's and my conversations.

QUELLE GRANDE SURPRISE.

Also, now craving shepherds pie, kthx.

[jukeboxhound.livejournal.com]

DON'T JUDGE OUR LOVE.

And I'm craving blood pudding. SHARE MY PAIN OF LONGING.

[chofi.livejournal.com]

Not judging, just pointing out the obvious.

[shiri-matakami.livejournal.com]

I helped create something beautiful, my life is now complete. <3

This made waking up at the buttcrack of dawn so much better.

I feel like Cloud and Ed meet because Ed looked hungry and sad so Cloud fed him. Like he and Al do when they see something cute and pathetic looking on the side of the road. Cloud woos everyone with his adorable face and awesome cooking skillz.

So you know that now you have given in to this orgie it will be the only thing I want to read ever. You have ruined me Hadesphoenix. Ruined

In the most awesome way possible.

Also, the only way to get better at smut is to write it. And post it here for my viewing pleasure. Obviously.

>:B

[jukeboxhound.livejournal.com]

I approve of this plothole filler.

(I might be practicing writing smut as we speak. I've been getting better! It started with euphemisms and progressed to actually using the word 'cock' and now we're getting somewhere. I WILL PREVAIL IF ONLY FOR YOUR OWN PLEASURE.)

Late reply is late.

[shiri-matakami.livejournal.com]

A late reply is better then no reply. Because now I got to remember why I I love crackfic <3

ARE YOU GOING TO POST THIS SMUT? BECAUSE, LIKE, IF IT IS JUST FOR ME THEN I GUESS I COULD SHARE IT WITH THE WORLD INTERNET AT LARGE?

The hardest part is actually getting up to the word cock, because there is only so much higher you can go on the embarrassment scale of sexy words. :b

[kitty11chan.livejournal.com]

This is highly entertaining. More please?

[jukeboxhound.livejournal.com]

Eventually, promise. I may have had bits and pieces of the next three parts sitting around on my harddrive for a while. It's only a matter of time and energy.