fic: imperfect tense (ff7+ff8)

[jukeboxhound_backup]

Imperfect Tense
Chapter 9

FF7/8 || R - sexuality, battle violence, language || Squall/Seifer, Sephiroth/Cloud || crossover
Jenova's legacy, living on through the Sorceresses, is forcing Squall to deal with an unstable Seifer, Cloud Strife, and yet another potential end of the world. Maybe paperwork really wasn't so bad.

Friday.

Doctor Kadowaki was a small woman with a pleasant smile that made her look half her actual age. Her pride in her work was reflected in the comfortable cleanliness of the infirmary.

Squall had alerted her that he was bringing in a patient for a physical and that she had ten minutes to prepare, so with an exasperated sigh she started fixing up one of the solitary rooms. The hiss of the infirmary doors opening was followed by the familiar creak of leather and clinking of buckles, and she straightened the spectacles on her nose as she stepped out to meet Squall, Quistis, Zell, and a stranger that was presumably her short-notice patient. At least no one was bleeding out or missing a limb.

"I'm Doctor Kadowaki," she said kindly to the stranger, bowing a little. He seemed restless, eyes flickering with paranoia around the place, and seriously, mercenaries really were the worst sort of patients. His face was pale, but that was probably just anxiety; she didn't see any fever-sweat, flushing, or stiffness.

"…Cloud Strife," he said finally. Sparing a small smile for the SeeDs, she asked them to remain in the waiting room and nudged Cloud towards the single room.

"Take a seat on the bed." She didn't try lightening the mood with humor, not with the way he stood so tensely in the doorway for a few seconds before moving jerkily forwards. Kadowaki busied herself with cleaning a stethoscope so he wouldn't feel cornered under her attention. "Please remove your shirt."

Another silent pause, and then he was slipping off the heavy sword harness and leaning the huge weapon against the wall, within reach. When she finally glanced up he was sitting bare-chested on the edge of the bed, fingers curled under its edge, gaze fixed on the far wall like he was prepared for her to take an axe to his neck. His behavior, and the scars that marked up his body, were nothing she hadn't seen before in her line of work, but barring the fight with Ultimecia there hadn't been many recent occasions for fighters to see a battlefield.

Kadowaki pressed the stethoscope against his chest, said, "Breathe in," heard nothing but clear lungs and a steady, if rapid, heartbeat. Somewhat high blood pressure, but again, probably a side effect of Cloud's obvious anxiety. The glow in his eyes gave her pause, and she considered a spell gone wrong, overdrawing on magic, maybe something to do with the Guardian Forces they still didn't really understand, but when she asked he just said, "It's personal," and refused to clarify.

Taking his hand, patiently waiting for him to work through the reflex to lash out, she rotated his wrist, flexed his arm, moved on to the other. Since Cloud was nearly as thin as Squall and a few inches shorter, the strength she could feel in the muscle under her fingers was…startling. And possibly suspicious, once she turned over his forearm.

"Do you do drugs?" she asked bluntly, examining the pinpoint scars nearly invisible on his fair skin. Her eyes followed the long lines of muscle and sinew, and her brow furrowed when she realized that some of the scars on his body weren't made by weapons or hardship. Only a small, sharp blade from a steady hand could've made those.

"No."

She hummed thoughtfully, although to be fair the track marks did look rather old. "So where did they come from?"

"They're not self-inflicted," he muttered, maybe meaning more than just the track marks, and the rawness in his tone made her wonder if maybe he really was telling the truth.

"Cloud, I'm not trying to pry for the sake of gossip. These are things I need to know, especially if you'll be going on missions where other people are relying on you."

He inhaled sharply, but didn't say anything, and with a silent sigh Kadowaki turned to retrieve a syringe. Abruptly Cloud was getting to his feet and yanking his sleeveless top back on.

"Please sit down, I just need a blood sample and it'll only take a minute – "

"No."

"Cloud, please sit down."

"I'm fine."

"It'll take me just a few seconds, for Hyne's sake – "

"No."

"What's going on?"

Slightly raised voices had summoned Squall to the doorway, arms crossed and expression demanding an answer right the fuck now, please. Kadowaki sighed and put the syringe away, didn't want to cause more of a scene. "It's nothing, Squall, we're fine."

But the commander was holding a staring contest with Cloud, both about as immovable as walls and stubborn as dogs. "Are you afraid of blood, Strife?"

Sudden laughter startled both the commander and the doctor. It was bitter and so far from the definition of 'laughter' that Kadowaki winced. "I've been seen by your doctor and she said I'm fine," Cloud said. "The longer we're here, the less prepared we are to stop Jenova fucking up your Sorceress."

Squall twitched like he'd been bitch-slapped, but it worked. After a long pause he ground out, "Zell will take you to your quarters, Strife. Be prepared to leave by oh-eight-hundred."

…

Hyne, but Selphie could swear that the train ride to Galbadia was taking longer than usual. She'd been spoiled with the sleek beauty and power of Ragnarok under her hands, and now she had nothing to distract her from thoughts of a messy, terrified Rinoa. Beside her Irvine had his feet propped up on an empty seat across the aisle, Exeter leaning against his shoulder, and the sight of the rifle made Selphie's stomach twist. She hoped, hoped, hoped it would be unnecessary, even if in all likelihood Rinoa had only gotten worse in the last few hours.

See, Selphie liked Rinoa. More relaxed than Quistis, quicker to laugh, and another girl with whom Selphie could act like the teenager she technically was. The problem was the difference between mercenaries and civilians, and she privately suspected that kind of divide was a big part of Rinoa and Squall breaking apart. She glanced at Irvine and figured she knew what it was like to do that whole caring-for-someone-you-can't-have thing.

"So," she started, swiping Irvine's hat and slouching down to mimic his pose, "whaddya think of Cloud?"

He just shrugged and settled lower in the seat. "I don't trust him."

"You sound like Squally."

"Think about it, darlin'. He comes out of nowhere predicting the return of…well, a Sorceress, for all intents and purposes, and now this thing with Rinoa? Mighty suspicious timing."

"You think Cloud was right? About Knights?"

"I don't know," he sighed, tipping his head back on the seat.

"If he is and Squall ends up getting screwed, I'm gonna be pissed," she muttered, folding her arms over her chest and scowling. Irvine smiled in amusement without opening his eyes. "Like, we bust our asses going after Ultimecia, and we get just enough peacetime for us to start getting comfortable before it all blows up in our faces."

Eyes still closed, Irvine unerringly reached out and ruffled her hair. "At least you'll be going down with the rest of us, right?"

She poked him in the side and finger-combed her hair straight again when he twitched away. "Damn straight."

It was rather sobering to see the amount of rebuilding and the remaining pockets of destruction in the city, but the people were helpful enough, and before too long Irvine and Selphie were standing in front of a hastily constructed apartment complex. Irvine took the chance to swipe back his hat as he whistled softly.

"Huh. Looks like the princess went down in the world a bit – ow!"

Selphie innocently tucked Strange Vision back into her belt and skipped up to the front door. Irvine followed at a more sedate pace, absently tapping Exeter against his shoulder and half-smiling fondly as the woman nearly tripped over her own feet. Coming back to Galbadia, he thought, would've been a lot harder without Selphie here; he might've hated Martine, might've spent a little too much time being entertained out in the city than actually training, but it was the place in which he'd grown up and it was in his blood. And Hyne but he hoped that his weapon wouldn't be the one that would have to take Rinoa out, not after all she'd been doing for this place.

He followed Selphie up the bare wooden stairs inside towards the upper stories. She was counting off door numbers in as many languages as she could, as quickly as she could, because she couldn't just do it like a normal person, before yelling, "This one!"

"Don't forget to knock, darling."

The sound of her fist against the door echoed in the bare hallway, highlighting just how empty the building seemed. They shared a glance before she called out hesitantly, "Rinoa, you in there? It's Selphie. Can I come in?"

When the silence stretched, Irvine quietly flicked off Exeter's safety. Selphie knocked again. "Rinoa?"

"Let's go," Irvine murmured, and Selphie grabbed hold of her nunchuks and pushed at the door. It swung open without protest, which was, yeah, strange, and then Selphie said, "Holy Hyne."

When she turned on the light, Irvine saw that what must've originally been a cozy little apartment turned into the aftermath of a small hurricane. Every glass or porcelain object, including the window, was shattered and laying in razor-sharp pieces on nearly every flat surface, and Irvine realized that his boots were crunching on slowly melting ice.

"Well, shit," Selphie muttered.

Irvine huffed with tense laughter as he covered the rest of the apartment, a small bedroom and a tiny bathroom. He shook his head. "She's not here."

"Who're you?"

Both SeeDs whirled around, weapons raised, and the blonde girl in the doorway squeaked with terror.

"Sorry, sorry!" Selphie cried, hurriedly ducking her nunchuks behind her back with a forcibly wide grin. "You kinda surprised us. We're SeeDs. We're, uh, friends of Rinoa's."

"SeeDs?" the girl repeated blankly, eyes fixed on Exeter.

Irvine quickly lowered the barrel and automatically relaxed into a lazy slouch, flicking the wide brim of his hat. The girl blushed. "We're looking for Rinoa, sweetheart, you seen her?"

"Uh, y-yeah, I've seen her, we've had lunch together a few times."

"Well, ain't that a coincidence." Irvine smiled like every cowboy and buccaneer who'd ever charmed the petticoats off a pretty lady. "You know where she is now? We're thinking she might be in some trouble, but we can't help her 'til we find her."

"Um, I don't know. She stopped showing up to work a couple days ago. She wasn't looking very well, but she kept saying everything was fine."

"Any idea where she might've gone?" Selphie picked up. "Maybe she mentioned another friend?"

The girl shook her head, a little wildly. Selphie leaned towards Irvine and said from the side of her mouth, "I'll let you be the one to tell Squall we couldn't find her."

…

The Garden's guest quarters had been built near the entrance, owing to the greater security and closeness of the conference rooms. They were larger than the typical two-person cadet dorms, came complete with their own kitchenette and full bathroom, but were also about as practical and simple as one might expect from a mercenary facility.

Hours after Zell had showed him to his new accommodations, Cloud was still sitting at the dining table and staring out the small, slightly open window that overlooked one of the Garden's courtyards. He hadn't noticed the sun setting, the gloom slowly settling over the room. Not even a full day had passed since he'd met the SeeDs and it already felt like years, and he. He probably shouldn't be alone. Not with the way the quiet was starting to press in on his skull. Except the only person he really wanted to see was dead from a minor case of firing squad.

Sometimes you gotta laugh so you don't go insane, Zack said, but Cloud didn't think that was very helpful advice when thinking about being flat on your back while someone else made pretty designs in your flesh with a scalpel. He didn't hear the door hissing open behind him.

("Specimen C is responding beautifully. The childhood influence of mako on his immune system is working in our favor.")

Ultima was suddenly in his hand and whistling through the air before Cloud realized he'd even moved, the blade's edge a breadth from Leonhart's throat. He blinked. Pay attention, Zack always used to say.

Leonhart waited for Cloud to lower his weapon and prop it back up against a chair before bracing a hip on the table's edge. Cloud went back to staring out the window, thinking that it smelled like it was going to rain soon.

Leonhart stared at him.

Brick walls, said Zack.

"Selphie told me about Seifer," Cloud said, and Leonhart twitched. "She said you two were close." Well, sort of.

"We were enemies," Leonhart replied in the kind of tone that suggested he ate ice cubes and frozen steaks as a midwinter snack. Cloud glanced sideways at the scar running over Leonhart's nose and thought about the Masamune, sliding so smoothly through his heart while cracking ribs, and wondered, Is there a difference?

"What does it matter?" Leonhart asked.

Cloud's immediate response was to say that it didn't, but that'd be a lie. "Depends on you," he said instead. "Whether it's Rinoa that cracks or Seifer, or hell, both, they might come after you specifically." He paused. "Or vice versa, if you're the one that goes."

He still wasn't sure if Sephiroth's fascination with him had been because of Cloud himself, or because of the bits of Zack in him, and he wasn't sure which was worse. Judging from the tense way Leonhart was holding himself at the edge of Cloud's vision, Cloud's words weren't hitting far from the mark.

"You said Jenova had a Knight before. What was his relationship to you?"

In all likelihood Leonhart hadn't meant that the way it sounded, except Cloud was already thinking about hot skin between the sheets, few spoken words, only ever in the dark. I'm worried, Zack's expression always said in the mornings where Cloud winced if he moved without thinking.

Figuring he should throw Leonhart a bone, he just said, "Sephiroth was my commanding officer."

"And that's why you were there the last time Jenova appeared?"

Sure, why not, as good a reason as any and better than most. "I killed her." Cloud's eyes slid over to Leonhart without his head turning. "Which is why you all need to listen to my orders when we find her, even with all those ice magic shows you've been putting on."

"I'm Junctioned to Shiva," Leonhart said, as though that explained everything. Cloud had no idea what that meant, but whatever. "Did you also kill Sephiroth?"

Cloud

("Thank you, Cloud," Ultima sliding so smoothly through his heart while cracking ribs, so much blood running down the blade and over Cloud's hands, streaking pale naked flesh)

blinked several times and said calmly, "Yes."

…

Squall had developed this habit, in times of crisis or other people's stupidity, of just putting his head down and bulling through it as efficiently and effectively as he could. But now Strife was implying a correlation between past relationships and future obsessing from crazy people, and if Rinoa and Seifer were going to be involved – well.

("This doesn't make us BFFs, Puberty Boy.")

("Whatever.")

This might get awkward.

Previous parts:
DW || LJ

Comments

[green-animation.livejournal.com]

" Except the only person he really wanted to see was dead from a minor case of firing squad." and

"("Thank you, Cloud," Ultima sliding so smoothly through his heart while cracking ribs, so much blood running down the blade and over Cloud's hands, streaking pale naked flesh)"

Ouch. in the best, brightest way this is absolutely heartbreaking.

[jukeboxhound.livejournal.com]

...I admit, that first line makes me lol, and I'm a bad person for it.

Thank you. :)

[green-animation.livejournal.com]

I can actually really imagine a sulky/brat-mode Cloud spitting that out at someone. And you're welcome :)

[kitty11chan.livejournal.com]

Hmm, the above post hits all my points.

[jukeboxhound.livejournal.com]

WOOT. \o/

Although I gotta ask, what points, so I can try doing it again? /shameless

[(Anonymous)]

Just found this fic, and I read it all in one go! I don't often like FFVII/FFVIII cross overs, but I really like this one. I like the characterizations. I like Squall's interactions with Shiva, and I like Cloud's combination of three-in-one. Your pacing's also great, giving just enough back story and action to keep things interesting without ever bogging the plot down. Really well written!

[jukeboxhound.livejournal.com]

I'm especially honored that you'd give me a chance when you don't have much faith in these crossovers, so thank you. :) (And it's relieving to hear that about the pacing, since I'm not used to writing short chapters for a multipart, ahaha.)

[gargoule.livejournal.com]

I just reread all of this and i'm still amazed.
i can't wait for the next bit!

[oceanandspace]

Loved, loved this! Especially the last part of the chapter. I can't wait to see how it's going to turn out, when everybody get back together! (also, the bits about how Zack talks to Cloud? Love it too!) ^^

[jukeboxhound.livejournal.com]

This is because Zack is too awesome for death and Cloud too obsessed to let him go OH SNAP.

Thanks. :D